You know that moment when life decides to remind you that you’re not in control of anything? Well, here I am again, staring into the face of my old nemesis: FRUSTRATION. It shows up uninvited, kicks down the door, and makes itself at home like it’s been waiting for this moment all along. And what do I do? Nothing. Because the truth is, I don’t know how to handle it. I never have.
Oh, but the cherry on top? The well-meaning comments from people around me. “It’ll get better,” “You just have to stay positive,” or my personal favorite, “Everything happens for a reason.” Oh, really? What’s the reason, then? To drive me into a complete meltdown? Thanks, but I didn’t ask for a motivational speech.
The Only Solution: Leave Me Alone
No, seriously. Just don’t talk to me. Not because I don’t care about you, but because when frustration takes over, my mind stops functioning like a normal human being’s. I can’t think clearly, I can’t process things rationally, and worse yet, I become a little… sharp. Let’s call it aprimitive defense mechanism. Words come out sharper than I intend, and sarcasm turns into my default mode.
It’s not that I want to lash out – I don’t. It’s just that I don’t know how to protect myself properly in those moments. I’ve always been this way. Even after years of therapy (oh yes, I’ve done the whole “work on yourself” thing), I still react to frustration with the same combination of confusion and poorly contained aggression.
Frustration, Distrust, and the Never-Ending Cycle
Here’s the thing about frustration: it never travels alone. It comes withdisappointment, distrust, and that nagging voice telling me I’ve made yet another mistake in trusting others. It makes me question everything, including myself. So, tell me, why should I keep giving so much of myself to people when I know the fallout will only hurt me?
The answer is simple: I shouldn’t. I need to protect myself more, share less, and stop pretending I’m some kind of emotional Swiss army knife. I can’t fix everything and everyone, and quite frankly, my own life demands enough from me without the extra weight of others’ expectations.
I Don’t Need to Know Your Reasons
And no offense, my dear friends, but I don’t need to know your reasons. I don’t care why you let me down, why things didn’t go as planned, or why I feel this way. I just need you to let me rest. Let me shut the world out for a bit, let me organize the chaos in my mind, and let me be – without explanations, without apologies, without solutions.
So, here’s my final thought: frustrated, tired, and fully aware that this is my reality – at least for now. I’m not looking for answers or fixes. I just need time. Until then, farewell.
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